The beggar

Something that I saw today made my heart skip a beat and my blood boil at the same time. That moment I realized that I am indeed very lucky. Every one else who is reading this post is equally lucky. Not because I am talented writer (would love to be one in the future) but because all of you have access to internet and in some way can afford the same.

What is this sight that affected me so much? Thinking of it even now gives me chills down my spine. I was in a restaurant having my evening snack (S, I do have the 4^th meal ;) ) that’s when I saw a man begging. I am very much against begging, especially if that person is physically fit. Mumbai as a city has a lot of beggars. 

Most of them demand alms as if it were their birth right and my bondage to oblige. Many a time’s people are harassed at signals by beggars. I too have been a victim of that. This is one characteristic of the city that disgusts me.

Coming back to our beggar of the day, he was in rags and very dirty. Of all the people nearby he kept asking money only from one lady in the sandwich shop opposite to the restaurant I was in. The shopkeeper asked him to leave. He was shooed like a dog. That sight made my heart sink.

There was a point in which the shop keeper poured cold water on the beggar asking him to leave. All that while he didn’t move an inch, he just stood there, holding his hands out asking that lady for money. She was just too taken aback to do anything.

Finally, with the bottle of cold water all over him the man still stood tall. His hands were stretched out and he kept looking at the woman. The definition of persistence it is him. The lady’s husband held out change to the man. He held it high so as not to touch him even by mistake.

The coin fell on the floor and the beggar picked it up with delight. I could see his face glow. How much would that coin be worth, 1 or 2 or 5 at the maximum 10? But that brought more joy to his face than when I heard that I got my first ever job.

That moment I realized that all, my life I had a stereotype in my head: “All beggars are bad!” May be they are not, may be it is the situation that forced them into that life.Sometimes I feel that we all give up too easy. May be because what we want doesn’t mean much to us. Consider the beggar to be yourself and the shopkeeper to be the person who can grant you what you have dreamt of. Some will leave when asked to. They give up even before the cold water bites their skin. Some others leave when they are threatened. A few would with stand the cold water upon them. Probably a hand full would stand tall and hold their hands out for something they want despite all odds. The one who persists gets blessed by God with all that one’s heart desires.

This day taught me three things:

·         Don’t stereotype people based on what they do.

·         Persist on your efforts; stand tall against all odds and what you want will be yours.

·         I am indeed very luck, may be I must thank God more often and appreciate it better.

Good night! J

How to win the pot of Gold at the end of a rainbow?

One does wonder why some amoung us are great and others not so. Destiny, some might say. But God loves us all; He wouldn’t choose one over the other. There is no carrot and stick approach by God.  Thus, it leaves us with that daunting question “Why some great and others not so?”

We all get up every morning with a purpose and a grand plan. Just that Bill Gates tells it to the world and most others don’t. We don’t tell not because we don’t know the purpose of our existence. We shy away in thought of what others might think. For example, I wake up every morning in hopes that one fine day I could become a writer. But I wouldn’t have voiced it out to many, because at multiple levels I doubt my purpose myself. Lack of trust in ones dreams; this is a pandemic.

The reason for all this is that all that we love to do or feel is the purpose of living need not be a good and dependable source of bread and butter. Maslow’s hierarchy rightly stated that only when you have the basic necessities of life will u even think of self-esteem and actualization.  In this pursuit for basics we forget the supreme goal and the reason for our very existence.

So what does all this have to do with greatness? Trust me, it does. People are great by choice. They decided what they wanted and worked towards it. They didn’t work for the end result but for the joy that the journey gave them. Success was an outcome not the objective. There was a popular study (Marsh mellow challenge: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0_yKBitO8M) which described how performance depreciates with increase in pay. When the external motivators such as money keep increasing the pressure to perform also increases and suddenly the work becomes less fun.

A good friend of mine jovially mentioned that the job of human resources department is all about motivation. It angered me at first. But he was in no way wrong. Laugh all you may but that is all there is to it. Simplest things are the most difficult to perform. It reminds me of a line from a poem that my sister used to recite, “Easy to say, but difficult to do.” So, how does one ensure that the employees of an organisation are all great in what they do? The answer is quite simple; choose people who love doing what they are meant to do. Don’t send a lion to do a dog’s work.

We all have dreams, they are startlingly different from our actual profession. This is the sad fact. Soon we all resign to our fate and perform our jobs for the plush salary and beautiful sedan. The hours in office seem long and painful. When you hate something so much, how can you ever be good at it? When good is not achieved, why even bother about great?

Another reason for lack of greatness is poor goal setting. If one has the skill to win Olympics and instead sets national level goals, the person soon loses purpose in life. Goals must be evolutionary. If you have achieved all that you dreamed of, please dream  bigger and better. Success is the biggest depressant for most people. They reach a state where they don’t know what they must do next. Thus, to avoid this most people just don’t attain success. There was a character in a play, who wanted to go to a temple of Vaishnav Devi but never did despite of having all the time and money needed. He felt that if he went there, the purpose of living would be lost. We all thus keep running on a treadmill reaching nowhere useful.

If you want to be great here are the golden steps:

1.       Find out what you love from within.

2.       Don’t let your past decide what you future can or will be. Start on a clean slate.

3.       Take steps towards your goal.

4.       Enjoy every second in that journey.

5.       Make many friends on the way up, they will hold you if you don’t reach the top.

6.       Keep telling out loud what you want to achieve in life, even if it makes you seem stupid. It is others right to judge you and your right not to bother.

7.       When you reach your goal cherish it but don’t rake in it. Dream gain, find a new purpose. Then go to step one.

I remember a poem in which the poet drew an analogy between ones heartbeat and the drum beats to ones own grave. It is morose but true for those who lack purpose. If you love what you do, greatness will come to you on its own accord. Walk over the rainbow of life with love and purpose and not with greedy eyes on the pot of gold.

The Hmmm Theory

Two very good friends of mine, keep filling the chat window with "Hmmm". It lead me to think, am I so boring or is it a guy thing or may be both. If one person does it then it must be a person thing. It then struck me, most men say hmmm, most of the time! Unfortunately this was a pandemic thing. 

This was like my "Eureka!" moment. I have made an observation but really still didn't understand the underlying reason behind it. All I could do was guess, but it was not good enough. So I decided to ask the source of the Hmmm theory: my friends. They were all happy to help. At the end of very though provoking conversations here are the results:

• When in doubt say Hmmm: There are moments in your life when you just cant say a yes or no. Life is not always in black and white. There are shades of grey. Hmmm is the pioneer in grey shaded answers. I have a personal feeling that it originated when humans were cave men! Just think about it, this just might be one among our first few words. So when in deep sea say Hmmm.

• When a No would kill you: The evolutionary theory says that human beings react to a threat by "Flight, Fight, Fright." It is generally a combination of the three. Hmmm is apparently an evolved way of flight due to fright. Honesty is loved and appreciated as long as it is all in good humour. Try telling your friend, "Dude, your presentation sucked!" or worse yet, "OMG! You wear too much make up." Before I continue, there is something I must confess. I have done no analysis as such, and what I am about to write is just my opinion. Here it goes, "Men take criticism better than women." It is just a stereotype. It does have some logic behind it. Men are programmed by the society to be bold and to try new things. Thus they learn from mistakes and are receptive to constructive criticism. However women are expected to be perfect, always. Mistakes are generally not tolerated. Thus they are not open as men would be. But times will change and so will these stereotypes. How is this linked to men and their Hmmm. Well, they would want to break their lady's heart, would they? (In certain cases their nose, if the lady is strong. ;))

• To sound smart: There are moments in your life when you really have to say something but can't take the risk of being wrong. That's when "Hmmm" saves your day. Fill it when you face a tough situation. Makes you sound smart as well as covers up the fact that you have nothing meaningful to say. It is basically a God sent monosyllable.

Hence forth you hear a "Hmmm" dig deep and try to understand what it means. Who said that men are simple and women are complex. It is the other way round. There may be more interpretations and applications to the Hmmm. My dear readers are welcome to share their observations as well. 

Erandu madham!

Kadantha erandu madhangal than en vazhkai naane thirumbi parthen. Neraya solla aasipadugiren. Adhai elam thamizhil solluvathi than seri endu manathuku thondriyathu. En endral thamizhal that adhan anubavangalin azhathai, serpaga sitarikamudiyum. Enadhu thamizh kochianadhu than, idhai padipathu kooda satru kadinam than, analum muyarchi thavar elai. Idho ezhudhugiren, andha erandu madhagalil ennal maraka mudiyatha tharunagal evai than:

·         Naan samaitha semiya upma vilirundhu vandha manathil, naav uriya tharunam.

·         Kalai moondru mai pol vanam thirandhu mazahi kottiyathai, imaigal kottamal sumar aruvadhu nimidam kazhitha tharunam.

·         En thozhi avalin vinodhamana mudivai, thelivaga sindhithu sonna tharunam.

·         Endha suzhal vandhalum en pakka balam aga irundha nambarkal udan kazhitha tharunagal.

·         Kaneer kan il irundhu, keezha vizhum mun, kan simiti adhai maraitha tharum.

·         Mudipatha ela thodaruvatha endra kuzhapathil thiridha tharunam.

·         Nanbargal undan senrthu siritha tharunam.

·         Kavail pattu kavali pattu salithu pona tharunam.

·         Avargalai nenaithu paava pattu, kai korthu kadavul idam vendiya tharunam.

·         Karthu irundhu karthu irundhu, salithu poi, chi po thevai elai endru udhari vittu  nagarthu ponna oru tharunam.

·         Imai moodi, isaiyil moozhgi, ennai naane thulaitha tharunam.

·         Oru kurudan ennudaya pugai padam edutha tharunam.

·         Thaiyin araivanapunkum, kuralukum, anbikum engiya tharunam.

·         En kolusin osai meedhu kadhal vandha tharunam.

·         Manam seri seithu kola panathai thanniyaga selava seidha tharunam.

·         Ennai pokkisham pola parthu kola epozhuthum ne en kapathil amartha tharunam.

·         Nal iravu, panadu maniku, thiyaga theruvil nadantha pozhuthu, manadhil salanam undagiya tharunam.

·         Iravil thukathai kanavillai endru kavalthurai idam pugar kudukalam endru sindhitha tharunam.

·         Vellai epadi seiyavendum endru purindhu konda tharunam.

·         Swayanalavadham, anaithu manidhanukul ooriponadhu endru unardha tharunam.

·         En veetin padukai kaga yengiya tharunam.

·         Sila pithiyangalil vai ai aditha tharunam.

·         Paaratum perumaivum vadhu serdha tharunam.

·         Naan seiya pogirathu seriya endru ennakul pattimandramae nadathiya tharunam.

·         Thirimbi parkamal odividalam endru thondriya tharunam.

·         Pathu rubai kaga thruvil vyabari udan nadantha sudana vakuvadham.

Epadi solli kondae pogalam. Silathai solla mudiyum, silathai solavathu nagarigam elai. 

Wave struck

I stood there,

Staring at this huge wall,

It moved towards me,

Clear, slow,

Powerful and orderly.

I didn't move,

I didn't resist,

I held on to my paper bag,

I stood there.

It moved and hit me,

I was drowning,

Yet I was smiling.

Irony of it hit me stronger than the wave,

I felt it drag me with it,

I didn't even wink.

How often do you get to ride,

On a wave,

With God as its driver?

I smiled.

I think He wanted to clean me.

But am I so dirty?

That He had to send me wave?

A tidal wave!

The wave too passed,

It left me pristine and clear,

I stood there,

Hugging the only things that matter to me,

That paper bag.

It had all that I loved,

All that You made me fall in love with.

Notes from all near and dear,

Letters from well wishers,

Pens, perfumes, chocolate wrappers,

Tickets, coins, photos, purse.

I stood there,

With a smile. 

I didn't check my paper bag,

I knew that it would be fine.

It always has been and will be,

It was me that I was worried about.

I felt like the wave cleaned me,

But it also took a part of me.

I felt lighter,

Not in joy,

But because a part of me was washed away,

I stood there,

with my paper bag.

Hoping for the tidal wave,

For it to return my dirt.

It might be dirt,

But it is my dirt.

It makes a part of me.

The wave made me realize,

I must toil again,

Till I collect new dirt.

This wont be the same as the old dirt.

One day He might wash it also away.

But I know to get dirty,

All I have to do is work,

He wants me to start all over.

You can't argue with Him.

I stood there,

Smiling to myself,

Holding my paper bag,

Not knowing if I should love Him,

Or curse Him.

He knows best,

He also hurts the best.

To call him God,

Is just too odd,

I call him the wave.

My own tidal wave!